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Footy Archive

The Hayne Train Is My Deep Sleeper Fantasy MVP Pick For 2016

Fantasy Dingo

And so the inevitable Australian takeover of the National Football League begins with a letter. Perhaps inspired by The King's penmanship in Sports Illustrated earlier in the year, Jarryd Hayne, one of Australia's finest and most exciting rugby league prospects, announced his intention to retire from his chosen football code, effective immediately, to take up the challenge of making it in the NFL. 

He's the latest in a long line of rugby league players to jump codes, following in the footsteps of players from Israel Folau to Matt Rogers to Michael O'Connor, all the way back to the greatest player of all time, Dally Messenger, in 1907.

But this is no average code jump. This is not a man who will have to make subtle adjustments in where he stands on the field, on whether he plays the ball or places it back to form a ruck. This is a GD explosion, an armageddon, a rebirth, a second spawn, an apocalypse, a recovery from total amnesia, a Benjamin Button-ing-like backwards learning of life if the old man was born with alzheimers and then had to relearn everything again from scratch. And who's the one man in rugby league who could bounce back from that kind of old man/early life memory loss? The Hayne Train, of course. 

He has the Football Smarts. He loves to Get Involved. Depending on what position he chooses to adopt, he may need to put on bulk, but he already has Great Size and Electric Speed. As one of the few analysts who can speak with Real Authority about both codes, I think he is most likely to succeed if he trains as a wide receiver and lines up in the slot, Wes Welker style, taking short passes and relying on his footwork to provide plenty of yards after the catch. The Train himself is talking about focusing on kick and punt returning, but I think that's setting the bar too low. Aim high, you glorious bastard. Drive that choo choo train into the GD sky.

If Hayne is still available in your dynasty keeper leagues, my advice is to swoop in and pick him up off the waiver wire immediately.